Sometimes I wonder who faces the hardest road dealing with Nancy's homegoing. I lost part of my self, and that will always hurt. But Leah, Josh and KJ experienced grievous loss as well. I walked this earth for 20 years without her, but these guys never took a heartbeat apart from her until August 30. My kids were not expecting to lose Mom so soon.
They also deal with me without their Mom, which means redefining the terms of the other parent/child relationship. And I know it's not easy dealing with me, without Nancy as a buffer. Moms supply the relational glue for most families. Ours was no exception.
A funny thing about this impending six month mile post, I almost seem to have turned a corner, But, or maybe because, of that, each of the three kids have encountered a rough patch. That's often the way in families; we tag team. Taking turns, being weak and being strong.
I have been prayed through lots of steps on this valley: deep mourning, health scares, the pain of writing and remembering, of reentering the world alone. Now I want you to focus on the three heroes who helped me bring Nancy Home. May HE carry them through this vale of tears.
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Dan, I am praying for all your kids, their spouses, and your grandkids who all miss Nancy so much. As a mother who longs to be with my daughter, I can only imagine how Jess would feel if our roles were reversed and she was here on Earth grieving my temporary absence from her life, and I pray with that perspective that God would continue to comfort your sweet children - with love, Cindy
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